Due Dates and Orange Pumpkins!

We finally took our week 40 pictures! We got to take my awesome orange pumpkin pictures, which makes me so happy! He can come any time now! Haha. The pictures turned out great, too.  I got a side picture taken where I held the giant (and very heavy) pumpkin alongside my belly – I was surprised at how accurate that size is compared to my belly and makes me feel even more huge than I already do! That pumpkin is BIG and my belly is just a tiny bit bigger! Holy cow! Right now it’s like there’s a little mountain taped onto my front and I can’t see hardly anything past it! 

40 weeks along! Happy Halloween!!

Little man is constantly moving and  beating me up! I can’t help but wonder if he’s going to be as feisty and ornery as he has been inside of me. He’s always beating up on me, he gets sassy when my kitty sits against my belly – I can’t tell if it’s playful and happy or annoyed, but he always gives her a pop or a shove.

Today I was looking over at the cradle, which is all cleaned and emptied and ready for him, and I thought about how in a matter of days/weeks I will have a little baby to lay in that cradle. I’ve gotten so used to seeing the crib, cradle, dressers, car seat, all the baby stuff we have and it’s just started to be part of the home décor… But to think that really soon we’ll have a baby to finally use/put in the stuff is crazy. But the other part of me is appreciating this time I have to myself – being on official maternity leave or whatever – and the evenings being a little bit normal still with Luke and I… I need to just enjoy this while I have it because he’ll come when he comes and it’ll be here before I know it, whether it’s tomorrow or in two weeks.

It's gotten harder and harder to see Luke off to work every morning. I enjoy my time at home, don’t get me wrong, but I really wish he could be here with me. I've joked about faking going into labor so he could work from home – lots of women have ‘false labor’, right? Additionally, my family has started to anxiously await my texts and calls, no doubt wondering if it's THE call every time their phone rings.

While a small part of me remains reserved and not sure if I’m ready, the rest of me is getting more excited and ok with the idea of it happening really soon – even today. Let’s get this show on the road and meet him already! Instead he seems very preoccupied with trying to get comfy inside of me and just hanging around for a little while longer. 

Ending Week 39...

Today while I was having my quiet time I was thinking/praying over Ps 139:13-16 again. I love that verse so much and I’m happy that I’ve had it to pray over him for most of my pregnancy. But I was thinking again about the part that says that God knew him inside and out and knew all the days of his life before he’d even lived one… it’s crazy to me because here I am, the mother of this child, I’ve had him inside of me for 9 months and no one else knows him like I do, and yet I still haven’t even seen him… I don’t know if he has a head full of hair or he’s bald, if his eyes are light or dark, what his face shape is… I especially don’t know things in the future like what kind of personality he’s going to have, what his likes and dislikes will be, or who he’ll be – and yet God already knows all of that. It’s a humbling thought to know that even though he’s my child and he’s inside me, he’s still God’s. God is the only One who knows him already. He knows how my labor is going to go, the ups and downs of us getting adjusted to having a new baby, how he’s going to grow and who he’s going to grow to be… It makes you wonder why you worry about so much when your knowledge and power is so limited and when God already knows it all. All I need to be doing is praying and letting go. God is giving me this child as a gift, I am to raise him and attend to him and make sure he is brought up in the Will of God, but he’s God’s child. I’m just a steward he’s bestowed this gift upon and I hope I never forget that… 

39 weeks pregnant... Almost there!

Busy Busy Busy!

The last few weeks have kind of flown by in a blur. Not only have I been working hard to get my to do lists all completed, I've been trying to keep up on my sleep (which is nearly impossible when you're this pregnant), prepare myself for labor, and keep myself from getting too caught up in check sheets forgetting there's a baby coming! I will hold my son in my arms in a matter of weeks, which is one crazy thought! 

We had our annual Halloween party last weekend. Yes, it was a little early this year but I didn't want to give Link a chance to crash the party. My costume turned out pretty well in the end. I had to take advantage of the opportunity, I don't know if I'll ever be pregnant around Halloween again. 

Happy Halloween!

 We also went and finished our registry at Target last weekend. Thanks to coupons, discounts, and our wonderful gift cards, we were able to get nearly everything we need and spend very little out of our pockets. It was such a blessing to walk away with so much stuff for baby Link without spending an arm and a leg! 

...after nearly four hours of shopping!

Throw in steam cleaning our carpet, working part-time, pumpkin shopping for our upcoming weekly shots, making sure I have everything my midwife will need to deliver my baby, and trying my best to keep up on things like the laundry and dishes, and you have a good idea of what my last few weeks have looked like. A busy blur of craziness! 

Luckily my to do lists are finally shrinking and I see a little bit of light at the end of the tunnel... and just in time, too! 

7 Days 'til Due Date!!

35 Weeks!!

I've hit what a lot of people are calling the "home stretch"! It's hard to believe I'm at 35 weeks already! Part of me feels like I've been pregnant forever and the other part of me can't believe that I'm due in just over a month. These last couple of weeks have have been riddled with reality checks and reminders of the fact that a baby is right around the corner. 

First off, we had our home visit from my midwife, Faith. She came to check out our layout and make sure we have everything we need. It was weird having her at our house after having always met at her house all of this time. It felt kind of like, 'why is my doctor in my bedroom?'

We also ordered and received our birthing kit for our home delivery. It contains everything Faith will need to deliver baby, including many mystery items that have completely confounded me. It also has an itty little hat for baby's head right after he's born - seeing how small it is, holding it in my hands, was a reality check in and of itself!

Then we had our baby shower. We finally have a car seat! Now we can take baby places with us!! It was a small shower but it was nice to see everyone and be surrounded by people who are excited for our little one. 

We are slowly starting to accumulate baby stuff and it's starting to transform the very dynamics of our home. Cribs, cradles, and baby car seats... There is often tiny baby clothing in the laundry as I try to get everything washed and ready for his arrival. Our house is starting to look like something different than it ever has before. Yes, everything is going to be very different from here on out and all I can do is hope and pray that I can keep up! 

The biggest tell tale sign of all, however, is how giant I am getting... or rather how giant HE is getting, and making me feel in the process. It's getting hard to see my own toes! It's been a long 35 weeks for my poor body and it's starting to have trouble keeping up with all that I demand of it. It's nice to know the finish line is in sight, even if I still feel a little under-prepared.

9/21/2013

Psalms 139:13-16

"Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out;

    you formed me in my mother’s womb.

I thank you, High God—you’re breathtaking!

    Body and soul, I am marvelously made!

    I worship in adoration—what a creation!

You know me inside and out,    

    you know every bone in my body;

You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit,

    how I was sculpted from nothing into something.

Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth;

    all the stages of my life were spread out before you,

The days of my life all prepared

    before I’d even lived one day."

-Psalms 139:13-16, The Message 

I came across this passage during a quiet time early in my pregnancy. I had read it many times before but with the knowledge of a baby growing inside of me it took a whole new meaning. I have prayed this section of Psalms 139 over my little baby many, many times over the last few months. I am so thankful for the little miracle that is growing inside of me and love the thought of God forming him inside of me, knowing him inside and out, and preparing all the days of his life before he is even born.

A Fruit A Week

So pretty much as soon as I found out I was pregnant I started trying to come up with ideas of how to track the baby's growth in fun ways. We decided on doing a fruit a week, based off of the size of the baby by comparing it to fruit or veggies. This seemed fun and creative so we started right away, at week 5. 

We had no idea what we were signing up for! Now we have weekly trips to the grocery store hoping to find something close to the size needed. I have a few apps that tell me the size of the baby each week, with a few discrepancies between them. I didn't consider that we'd have to account for the fact that fruits go in and out of season, some of the fruits only get imported to specialty stores around here, and that while there might be an average eggplant 'size' that doesn't mean the ones we have at our local grocery store are even close. It's also turned out to be a little more pricey of a project than I'd initially thought. However, after 30 weeks I do love looking back and seeing all of the fruits and veggies Lincoln has already 'outgrown'. Sometimes I jokingly tell my husband 'well, that was back when we had a blueberry baby...' 

Though the grocery store trips are sometimes frustrating, I do enjoy the memories Luke and I are creating by going and picking out our baby fruit each week. We've gotten more than a few strange looks when we've spent 20+ minutes wandering around the produce section of the grocery store holding and comparing seemingly unrelated fruits or vegetables, and have had to explain ourselves more than once when buy things like a single Brussels sprout, but it's been fun and I'll always treasure those memories. 

This project has also got me cooking with things I wouldn't normally try - like a Jimcama, which is basically a Mexican potato. 

It's crazy to think that we only have a handful of fruit photoshoots left, but at the same time it will be nice to not have to worry about it anymore. Either way, it's been fun to be able to look back and see how far we've already made it!

Weeks 5 (appleseed) through 34 (butternut squash).

Knit Inside My Womb

I don’t know how people can have the miracle of a baby and not believe in God. I know me, I know my body, and I know that I am not capable of making something out of nothing, of creating human life within my very belly with little or no direct effort on my part. And yet there is something that is growing inside of me, developing a brain, heart, lungs, and a personality, which was not there only months ago. Therefore, to deny that there is a Creator that made our bodies gifted to do the impossible is both ignorant and senseless. It is one thing to dismiss that animals and other creatures are capable of such things, as it is distant and disconnected from our lives, but once you have a baby inside of you, once you experience the miracle of a child, another human being, being knit together in your womb, I see no possible way to dismiss this as anything but an absolute miracle accomplished only by Someone as accomplished as my God. 

My baby Lincoln at 20 weeks.